[ The Fushigi Yuugi room was especially dull this night, so when this person wandered in, I greeted her. She left soon thereafter, but not before initiating this conversation. I started off rather serious, but then I decided to have some fun... ]

kaleidoscopebeauty: hi!:)

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Hello.

kaleidoscopebeauty: asl pls?

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Sorry, I don't answer that.

kaleidoscopebeauty: y?:-/

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Because it's an obnoxiously rude question?

kaleidoscopebeauty: i dont think so! got no idea who u r!

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Does it matter who I am? I am another intelligence somewhere out there on the Internet. What more do you need to know?

kaleidoscopebeauty: everything bout u! do u hve to hide ur identity?

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Nope. Why do you need to know my identity?

kaleidoscopebeauty: to hve sme idea bout u

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: You can tell many things about me. I like anime (which is why I am in an anime chat room), I like purple-blue italicised fonts for text, and I tend to type with proper spelling and grammar.

kaleidoscopebeauty: fine.....

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: What more do you need to know? You're never going to see me in real life. What does it matter if I am a guy, or a girl?

kaleidoscopebeauty: so i wud know wat to talk about.

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Girls and guys talk about the same sorts of things, no?

kaleidoscopebeauty: i dnt thnk so!!!!!

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: You don't?

kaleidoscopebeauty: yeah..

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: What different things do they talk about? I caution you not to be stereotypical.

kaleidoscopebeauty: k.

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: I see you can not come up with anything, then?

kaleidoscopebeauty: u go 1st !:p

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: I was the one who said that girls and guys talk about the same things. Of course I can't come up with anything.

kaleidoscopebeauty: r u genderless? wat r u/

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: What does it matter? Maybe I might be.

kaleidoscopebeauty: alien...i dnt talk to aliens

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Don't talk to aliens? That's quite a rudely xenophobic philosophy. You could probably learn a lot from an alien.

kaleidoscopebeauty: so speak up nw!

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: What would you like me to speak up about?

kaleidoscopebeauty: about disgusting & insensitive aliens!X-(

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: I've never met any disgusting and insensitive aliens. Unless humans count?

kaleidoscopebeauty: aliens always play bad roles in every movies. they r known to b like that

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: That's not true. I can think of many more movies where the main villain is a human.

kaleidoscopebeauty: name one & ill nme a bunch about villain aliens

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Commodus, from Gladiator. He was a human.

kaleidoscopebeauty: martians attack. species I,II,III....

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: I don't know about you, but I've never met a Martian. My spaceship didn't go anywhere near Mars as it was coming in.

kaleidoscopebeauty: i was enumerating all alien movies

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: There are more non-alien movies than alien movies. And most of those non-alien movies have human villains.

kaleidoscopebeauty: can we tlk of smething else?

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Sure. I would love to bring as much information as I can back to my homeworld. What would you like to talk about?

kaleidoscopebeauty: ursef

kaleidoscopebeauty: urself

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: You wouldn't find the life of this poor hatchling very interesting at all. I would imagine that, of my 2,396,330 hatchmates, I am the most boring of them all. You pitiful humans are much more interesting. Why don't we talk about you instead?

kaleidoscopebeauty: k im a woman!

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Ah. My race really doesn't have an equivalent. We use test-tubes.

kaleidoscopebeauty: cool. exciting life huh!

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Oh, yes. Except when a test-tube breaks and spills all over the place. I hate janitorial work.

kaleidoscopebeauty: i think got an idea about u. r u a scientist or a janitor?

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Yes. On my world, they're the same job. We call them "bakabakaminnabaka".

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: I am the 3,750th bakabakaminnabaka of the hive branch that has been sent to study this planet.

kaleidoscopebeauty: ur funny huh!

kaleidoscopebeauty: so what have u got about our planet?

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: The last alien race we met said the same thing. Their planet was vaporized to make room for an interstellar bypass.

kaleidoscopebeauty: r u telling me that u r now the villain/

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: No. I'm just saying that that's what happened to the other planet. We would do that to this planet, but we have grown much too fond of pickle relish.

kaleidoscopebeauty: can we talk of anything else except your planet n my planett.

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Well, we could talk about that other planet, but as I said, it got vaporized.

kaleidoscopebeauty: hw sad

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Not really! It reduced interstellar traffic jams by 20%!

kaleidoscopebeauty: oic..lol

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Besides, we did warn them. But no, they just had to evolve on that planet that we were scheduled to demolish. We had deadlines we had to make.

kaleidoscopebeauty: m so bored,

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Oh, that is saddening. For entertainment, we throw humans into vats of acid and watch them try to escape as their skin is dissolved. A most amusing sight, I assure you.

kaleidoscopebeauty: u jst prove to b indeed a villain

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Yes, but I like pickle relish.

kaleidoscopebeauty: bye

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: Goodbye. May we soon see you in the vats of acid.

kaleidoscopebeauty: ill c to it that i wont b there. bitch

kaleidoscopebeauty: >:)

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: It's really not that bad. And we only make you go in once.

kaleidoscopebeauty: ok. u go 1st

Yuuhi_da_chopstick_bishie: If it makes you feel any better. I doubt the acid would have any effect on my scales. I could even hold you in if you like.